At that time Samuel was not familiar with
the LORD. [1 Samuel
3]
Rising very early before dawn, Jesus left
and went off to a deserted place, where he prayed. [Mark 1]
It’s not too
late to make New Year's resolutions. But
why make resolutions when we know we won’t stick to them? I heard a therapist on TV answer that
question: "We decide that we can be different when we get tired of not
being different." The motivation to
change has to come out of some interior reflection, some inner desire. And often this desire comes from being ready
for something different because we’re tired of the way we are.
One of the
biggest changes in Samuel's life was to recognize that the Lord spoke to him.
For Samuel that meant several things that required change. Samuel had to now
become a listener. And, once he heard the Lord's words to him, he needed to
obey what he heard [1 Samuel 3:1-10, 19-20].
One of the
great resolutions we can make is to listen to the Lord more attentively and to
obey what we hear. For most of us, this
will take some real change. It will take
some "tuning in," much like finding a station on a radio. That reminds me of a personal experience I had
years ago.
There are
times that I have been complacent in my duties as a Catholic. There was quite a long period of time that I
had not been to confession. No
particular reason, I guess I just didn’t feel the need to. I was driving to Bakersfield from Stockton one
Sunday night and, as was my routine, I was listening to a “news talk” radio station
out of San Francisco. All of a sudden, there
was static on the radio in an area I was usually able to get reception in. I started fiddling with the dial, and the only
station that would come in static-free was EWTN radio. The program was called “Sunday Night Live”,
and the host (a priest) and his guests were talking about the Sacrament of
Reconciliation. I thought, “I’ll listen
to this stuff until I get around Fresno and get my other familiar talk-radio
channel to listen to all the way into Bakersfield.” When I got to Fresno, again
the only channel that would come in was EWTN and it was another program talking
about the Graces received by going to confession. The next day, all of my
familiar channels were available again. But
I have never been one to ignore subtle hints (like being hit over the head with
a sledgehammer), so I found the nearest church offering confession on Monday
and took advantage of the Sacrament. I
have been going regularly ever since.
Once we
practice listening to the Lord, His Word to us comes in "loud and clear."
Then the challenge is to obey what we
hear. Each of us can begin this new year
asking, "What could it be that the Lord is trying to say to me that I'm
just not listening to? Or we can ask,
"How could I slow down and get myself in a place where I'll be able to
figure out what the Lord is saying to me?" Perhaps we'll ask, "What is my head full
of right now (arguments, conflicts, anxiety, fantasies, anger, fear)?" Letting go of these might allow us to hear
what the Lord is saying to us. His
message to me is usually "Peace, I just want to you to live with more
peace and to know my love. Then, I can
call you to love others and bring my peace to them." We can't hear His message if our heads are
pre-occupied with all kinds of other stuff.
Just 35
verses into the gospel of Mark, Jesus goes off to pray alone. Everything was moving quite fast for Him. He
is baptized by John. The heavens open
and He’s confirmed by the Father. He’s led
by the Spirit to the desert where he is tempted but survives. He calls His first disciples. He confronts and drives out an unclean spirit.
He cures Simon Peter's mother-in-law,
and all the people start to bring their sick to Him. He just had to stop and reflect.
We can only
imagine what Jesus talked with His Father about. How did He thank Him for the experience of the
baptism? How did He "unpack"
the experience of being tempted by Satan, so boldly, so blatantly? How did He tell the Father what it was like to
cure Simon's mother-in-law, and to see her get up and serve them? Did He tell the Father that He learned from
her that the gift of healing was to allow us to be free to serve? It seems at the very least, He had a clearer
sense of His mission and what He was called to do, after this time of prayer
with the Father.
If we’ve
been trying to live a life of integrity and self-sacrificing love without
taking time to stop and pray, this is the time to make a new resolution to give
ourselves that time. Without time to
step back and reflect upon our experiences and what they’ve meant, and what our
Lord might be revealing to us through them, we’re like pilots flying without
radar in dense fog. Even though we’re
moving at 500 miles per hour, we can't see where we’re going and we’re likely
heading for a crash landing. With little
pauses throughout our day, and periodic times of deeper reflection, we can give
ourselves greater clarity and insight. And, gradually, God's desires will form in our
hearts. This can seem like a big change
to make in our busy lives. But we might
just do it this year because we’re tired of flying blind so much.
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