“The best thing a man can do for his children is to love their mother.”—Father Theodore Hesburgh, CSC
I can’t recall any time that my father gave even the appearance of anything contrary to the vows he exchanged with my mother at the time of their marriage. While I’m sure they had the normal disagreements that most married couples have, I never saw or heard them argue about anything while they were in my presence. The respect and support that Dad showed toward Mom continues to inspire me to do the same in my marriage.
When Mom and Dad were married, it was agreed that any children would be raised as Catholic. Mom was Catholic. Dad was Mormon but didn’t go to church services unless my paternal grandparents were visiting, as they were very devout. The only times I saw Dad in a church was at baptisms, weddings, and funerals. I saw him at the church every Sunday when he would drive Mom and us to Mass. Many times, he would just stay in the car and wait to drive us home. Although I never heard Dad speak about God, or Christ, or anything spiritual, I remember Dad as a man who obviously saw Christ in everyone and treated everyone he met with dignity and respect--sometimes even when they didn’t deserve it, in my opinion.
You know that a man loves a woman when he supports her even when she isn’t looking. I remember one time when Mom was in the hospital for a few days. Only my younger brother Tom and I were in the house with Dad at that time. About 7:00 in the evening, Dad called our oldest brother Bob to come over to say the Rosary with Tom and me because he knew this was something that Mom would be doing if she were home. There are many other examples I can cite that showed how much Dad loved Mom (and vice versa), but this was the moment in my life that defines the love and respect Dad always showed for Mom. And by extension, it defines how much he loved his children and grandchildren. Loving our mother was the greatest gift he had to give us.
Thanks for the “gift that keeps on giving”, Dad!
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