Forgiving someone you love is infinitely easier than someone you don't. The spirit of what Jesus says about forgiveness is that we should forgive ANYONE who needs it many more times than will feel comfortable or "right" or fair.
Part of what communicates God's grace in the world is the Spirit-freeing aspect of the act of forgiveness. Giving hurt and anger up to God and forgiving the person who created that them relieves such a burden. Everyone has done something, somewhere, sometime, to hurt another person -- whether intentionally or not, whether seriously or not -- so we all have something to consider within ourselves that needs forgiveness. God's forgiveness, through Christ, is meant to free us from the bonds of death. Death as expressed in the lies and deceits with which we live; death as expressed in the separations we experience in our relationships with others; death as expressed in the greatest separation: that of ourselves from God.
In the forgiving process, we are the ones needing forgiveness first. Whether we reflect on the forgiveness gained for us by Christ on the cross, an instance of our being forgiven by someone else, or a time where we have forgiven someone -- forgiveness starts at "home". Without recognizing the grace we have received, we simply cannot truly and honestly extend that grace to anyone else.
Forgiveness, being a grace of God, is free but not cheap. Forgiveness takes work and commitment. The work part is the inventory of just how we feel about the person and the situation creating the need for forgiveness. The work part includes looking at our own culpability in a situation and if it exists, owning it -- however small or seemingly insignificant. The work involves seeing the other person through the eyes of Christ. The work takes true shape in the encounter with the one who has hurt us. The work ends in the letting go of the anger, disappointment, and disillusionment that rests in our heart, binding our spirits. Laying it down at the foot of the Cross and stepping away, turning our backs on it. Trusting that God will give us what we need to heal, to become whole, to forgive.
Commitment comes with the change in our heart and soul--a change that is nothing short of a miracle. Commitment to forgiveness reveals itself in gentleness, in loving forgiveness of our own imperfections, and in loving forgiveness of the imperfections of others. Commitment to forgiveness brings a deep abiding joy to our hearts and souls which radiates outward. Commitment to forgiveness is just that...a commitment. Living a life of forgiveness, forged in our hearts by the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ demands an effort to be engaged in a relationship with Christ.
Engagement in a relationship with Christ brings us to that deep abiding joy in our hearts and souls because of the forgiveness we receive, time and time again. Engagement in a relationship with Christ is about accountability. We are accountable to God through Christ. When we become engaged in a relationship with Christ, we become part of the Body of Christ.
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